we're in pieces ft ryder

[sapphire matthews whitby]

sapphire watched the black lake move as she pondered where her life what been headed. just a few weeks ago she had had possibly the worst black out night in the history of her black out nights. but somehow, sapphire had gotten possibly the greatest thing out of it. ryder bletchley. he claimed to have met her that night, and slept her with her too but sapphire had remembered all but nothing of that night. hell usually when she blacked out she remembered at least having sex. not with who, but having sex. however with ryder, she had forgotten everything, it gave her the creeps. what if he was bad at it? what if the first time they had sex, sapphire didn't like it? their relationship had taken a huge turn into seriousness. it was huge and sapphire hadn't known what to do. the first boy she had ever given herself like this was the first guy she slept with and he broke her heart. she was scared to ever be with a guy who didn't like her sex and if he didn't? and if he broke up with her? if he broke up with her before they started dating officially?

sapphire wouldn't be able to handle that. she knew she was practically falling in love with ryder. that was the worst part of it all. if she was falling in love how was he feeling? what if he wasn't in love... what if he was sleeping with other girls while they were in their almost relationship bubble thing. sapphire had no idea what to think, she had no idea what to do. she hadn't slept with anyone since her black out night. she hadn't even slept with ryder, they were saving that for a special night, a night that while sapphire couldn't wait. she was also hoping wouldn't come. she was scared he wouldn't like her and with his history. then again, she had the same history. sapphire sighed slightly, pulling her knees up to her chest as the thoughts continued to eat at her brain. that's when she suddenly felt lips attack her own, she knew whose they were instantly and kissed back smiling brightly. her insecurities drifting away as ryder kissed her, she pulled away. "hi," she whispered to her unofficial boyfriend.

words: 384
notes: heyyy

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[ryder james bletchley]

love. the word made ryder shudder in fear. most people his age wanted love more than anything, but frankly this slytherin could do without it with no problems whatsoever. why? well he just didn't want to deal with getting hurt. dating someone for as long as he did, and then it ending, made it near impossible to trust anything that didn't have a dick hanging between its knees. but his own strategy backfired on him. ryder partied, and when he did, he partied hard. he was just fine with getting drunk off his ass, leaving winter to fend for himself in a corner, and then screwing a girl so hard that she couldn't get up for class the next morning. but then sapphire happened. it was no problem to actually get in her panties, those came right off. but she didn't even remember it remotely. it was like it never even happened. and that fact, that fact alone, was why he made such a heavy and driven pursuit. unfortunately for him, that resulted in true feelings to develop. and when he developed feelings, they were there to stay. even the boys commented on his changes, and there were a hell of a lot of them.

ryder didn't go partying unless she was there. if she was there he'd only dance with her. he'd talk with other girls, be a wingman, but it never went further than that. he was whipped without even being in an actual relationship. if it got worse, ryder would pull back. but for now, he was completely content with what was happening. he got the affection with none of the commitment. he thought about this on his walk back from quiddich practice, happy that he didn't get too sweaty this time around for fear of running into sapph- oh god. of course she was right there when he was passing the lake. the slytherin smiled and walked over to the girl's back, leaning around and giving her a tender kiss, his warm lips pressing against hers with the pounding of his heart in his ears. it was only natural that ryder emitted a whine when it broke, but he smiled at her regardless. "hey... you shouldn't be out here on your own, it's starting to get chillier. need my jacket..?"

words: 384
notes: look at this sappy man.
outfit: le uniform

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[sapphire matthews whitby]

sapphire and ryder. possibly the weirdest thing anybody had ever seen on the face of the planet. no one exactly understood what they had going on and they didn't exactly understand it themselves. when they went to parties together and they had to introduce each other to people it involved something like this is ryder my... special friend. then they would stare at each other because they both knew it was much much more than that. suddenly they would both start giggling. that was them. no one ever understood why they didn't just go out and something sapphire didn't either, but she liked it like this. no pressure, she didn't have to look nice. most of the times she saw ryder she spent it in sweats, unless she was trying to look nice. the only part that really concerned her was the fact that he hadn't tried to make a sexual move on her. was it because he didn't find her sexually appealing? sapphire had never had that problem before. she threw up sex appeal, that was sapphire, no one was sexier than her without trying.

ryder just made it easier for her to not try. the way he looked at her when she wasn't trying to look nice drove her crazy. everything about him drove her crazy. she wasn't exactly sure why she just didn't jump him every time she saw him. but that little voice inside her head drove her to think differently and act differently. and close herself. she didn't want to give herself to ryder to only find out that he was just playing her or worse... that he actually loved her. what if ryder had falling in love with her, sapphire wouldn't be able to handle that. she wouldn't know what to do, was she supposed to act different? sapphire wasn't even sure how to act around people when she was ryder. all she wanted to do was be with him, alone. hold him, cuddle him, do other things. but that scared her so much. "i'm a big girl," she grinned at him, after he spoke. she absolutely loved the way he whined when she pulled away. "you just want me to have your jacket." she spoke softly, like making her his property, she hated it but loved it at the same time.

words: 388
notes: heyyy

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[ryder james bletchley]

ryder was going to be a liar if he said he didn't want to sleep with sapphire. quite frankly, he wanted to pound her quite avidly and make the whole castle hear. but, he was trying to do things differently. he had to be a gentleman right? well, as best a bletchley could be a gentleman. he never was as concerned about blood status as some of his house mates were but he was a bit of a jerk at times, even to his friends. hell, winter got the brunt of it sometimes. the first thing he said after learning about his losing his v-card was 'did the carpet match the drapes?' deep down he cared, though. sapphire was basically the same sort of deal. sometimes he'd be an ass but she wasn't afraid to be one right back to him even if there were people around. was it appreciated? he didn't act like it was at that time, but as soon as he got time to think about it, that was exactly what he needed in a woman. he needed someone to tie him down and hit him if he misbehaved - in both the kinky and non kinky sense of the actions. otherwise, he'd simply be an ass to all and go off with every girl he saw. that wasn't an option with sapphire, simply because she knew how to push his buttons enough to make him stay.

maybe there was some truth when she said he only wanted to give her his coat so that she'd wear it. ryder was possesive... to a point that is. he'd never stop a woman from having friends that were men, or censor who she spoke with, but he was a firm believer in claiming what he saw was his. that meant giving clothes, large hickeys, and gifts in public. of course he didn't mind it the other way around, relationships were a mutual pull. "you're my big girl, though... sort of. and plus you look cute wearing my clothes anyway. don't complain, girls would kill for my stuff." he grinned and laughed a little bit, slipping his blazer off and slipping it on her shoulders, sitting down next to her. "plus you already have my grandfather's watch so let's just add this to your collection." this was said in jest, but in all seriousness ryder did know that she had it in her room somewhere, and lord knew he would find it one day. it was just a matter of time before he was in there with her anyway having some private time, and when she was too tired to get up, he'd simply do a quick sweep and find it to prove her wrong.

words: 456
notes: OOPS
outfit: le uniform

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[sapphire matthews whitby]

sapphire had been in one relationship her entire life. never had a boy looked at her and said she looked like a relationship type and though most would have taken that as an insult, sapphire didn't mind mostly because she didn't care. sapphire didn't care about many things, the image that other people had of her was one of them. though she would always care about what she thought of herself she never care for what that stranger thought or this one. therefore when people called her a slut sapphire said thank you, went to the nearest attractive man and charmed the pants right off of him. it wasn't exactly difficult plus sapphire got sex out of it. that all changed after her black out night. waking up with a man who swore they had slept together and her having not even a glimpse of remembering that she had had sex had been frightening for her. she never wanted to go through that. it was after that night that they had practically fallen for one another and that scared the living daylights out of sapphire. if he was truly falling for him and she was falling for him then this was just like her first relationship. when she had fallen for him and he had just been in it for her virginity then bailed. it took a lot for sapphire to trust another slytherin again but ryder changed all that.

though the thought of ryder being possessive completely turned her on it also scared her so much. she wasn't sure if she was ready for someone to tell her that they loved her, that maybe this was it for them. that she was it. sapphire had been that. she had seen something like it with her best friend and the way that they had just broken up, sapphire wasn't sure how to feel about relationships after that. sapphire looked over at ryder, what if she dated him for two years, like vara and winter, and then suddenly, poof? "i'm your big girl?" sapphire mulled over the words in her mouth. she loved the way it sounded, she began to grin brightly at him. sapphire closed her eyes as she felt the jacket over her shoulders. sapphire glared at him. "i do not and you know it, you slept over that one time remember? no watch!" she spoke. she began to smile, the sleepover with no sex, just cuddling. sapphire had never in her life thought she would have one of those... then ryder. it was amazing how quickly ryder was changing everything about her. she hated cuddling before and practically kicked boys out of her bed after sex, with ryder all she wanted to do was have sex all day and cuddle all night. too much to ask?

words: 464
notes: heyyy

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[ryder james bletchley]

"yes, when we're alone, you are my girl. you are my girl at parties, and everyone knows that you are ryder bletchley's special friend... whatever the bloody hell that means anyway." ryder mused with a quiet smile, looking at her and studying every feature - every flaw - every mark and miscolor from her complexion. it was all perfect. her flaws made her the most stunning girl he had ever seen, and it was terrifying. he had gotten to know girls that were much prettier in his friend's opinions, skinnier, higher cheekbones, bigger boobs. did he care in the slightest? no. because it was sapphire. he loved her vivaciousness and her spunk. the physical flaws? those were thrown out the door right when he started to really fall for her. it was when he woke up after that drunken night. through the fog of a pulsing, throbbing headache, he turned and saw sapphire lying beside him. he saw her sleeping peacefully, hair sprawled against the pillow of her bed with light highlighting the sparkle in it. it was breathtaking, and all the more terrifying for ryder to address. after all, he hadn't ever felt that way. with his upbringing, he was taught go fast and hard and do as many as you can before leaving, not to stare aimlessly at her for a good half hour and hold her close until you have to leave for class. of course, ryder did the latter.

ryder laughed at the last part of her comment, recalling the sleepover fondly. of course his buddies assumed the worst of the situation, and when he came back they did nothing but laugh and pat his back with comments like 'ryder you dog...' but no, it wasn't like that at all. they cuddled, they whispered, they were the only two people in that room and if the castle collapsed onto ryder and he died, he would have ended his life in sheer content. he hadn't ever slept in a girls room without expecting something, even with his ex girlfriend. could you blame him? he had a dick for brain usually, but sapphire turned that brain to absolute mush with no issues at all. so what was there for him to do except lay there and soak in the girl for all she was? sex would be for another time. hopefully soon, but he really wouldn't press her to do anything. he didn't want her to feel like damaged goods that he was preying on, exploiting. all his intentions were genuine so long as they didn't get too heavy too fast. with a quick grin, he put his arm around her and chuckled. "well, fine, but that means i need a new watch.. maybe ezra knocked it off in practice or something."

words: 465
notes: cuddlesnuggle
outfit: le uniform

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[sapphire matthews whitby]

how was sapphire supposed to deal with being a real relationship thing? the last thing she had ever really experienced as far as a relationship had been the guy she had lost her virginity to and that hadn't turned out too well for sapphire. she could still remember the pressure to give it up, his hands all over her body and her final sigh just wanting it to all go away. he was gonna leave her and sapphire didn't want that, at that time not having a boy to rely on seemed impossible for her. but he was only in it for one thing and once he got it, he got out so fast sapphire was left to pick up the pieces. it had been hard at first but the girl soon found comfort in sex and sexual favors. she became known and easy but great in bed and sapphire took pride in that. she was easy by the nature and the situation she had been placed in early on in life and she was making the best of it. but not with ryder. with ryder sapphire wanted to make sure he knew that she wasn't easy, that he had to work for it. on another part, she also didn't want him running off because he got needy. her worst fear was ryder finding out how easily she gave her virginity to her first, after he was roommates with ryder.

sapphire at him directly in the eyes when he spoke, practically shrugging off the word special. "i know what it means," sapphire spoke, her hand grazing ryder's cheek for a second. "it means we're special and no one else has to know," she winked at him before planting a soft peck on his lips. sapphire then placed her head on his shoulder, her gaze returning to the black lake. in reality they were so much more than the simple word special. they were in sync. they were one, they just perfect, but for sapphire to say all those things was not only terrifying, it just felt wrong. it was too soon for her to be singing about her undying feelings for the slytherin just as ryder shouldn't be doing same. they both kept their mouths proudfully shut and they both loved it. at least sapphire did. sapphire giggled at ryder's words. she felt bad about the case of the missing watch but she had no idea where it could possibly be. her part of the room wasn't exactly a mess but sapphire knew where things were. and she knew there was no watch in her room. though if sapphire was honest to herself and ryder she wished that his watch was in her room. it would mean that they had already had sex, that this looming first time between them wouldn't be so scary. "probably."

words: 475
notes: heyyy

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[ryder james bletchley]

the night when ryder lost his virginity was one which he tried to forget with all of his might. no, it was not terribly embarrassing or terrible in the general sense, it was actually wonderful. his father was at an event, his mother somewhere off god knows where, he had lit candles all around his room, surprising his girlfriend with mood music and flowers - right out of a terrible porno where the actors attempted to be romantic, but you knew they were just trying to get the sex over with. the night was something magical, and he bragged about it for months after the fateful rondez-vous. well, he did until she dumped him right onto his ass. did she care about his feelings at all? no. and that was why ryder was screwed over in the love department. he didn't want to care about a girl's first time with him ever again. it was find, fuck, leave. sometimes he'd have booty calls, sometimes girls begged for him (and man did that stroke his ego,) but if it got too serious he'd leave right away and denounce the girl as a crazy bitch. many were questioning when he would do that to sapphire, even he did. there was only so long they could go on like this before wanting something more, at least on her end. so what could ryder do? he didn't want a girlfriend. he didn't want to have to deal with all the psycho fighting and the chance of getting dumped. if he cared too much, he'd just end up more hurt than before.

"you're the first girl not to insist herself upon the girlfriend title, my dear, and for that i appreciate you." of course this was a half joke, "and i'm more than content with our special friendship." the slytherin gave her a kiss back, playfully nipping her lip, very very lightly. then, right after the parting he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her nice and tight, staring out at the lake just as intently as sapphire was. if he ever settled down, he hoped it would be with someone like sapphire. she was headstrong and confident, at least at a first glance. she'd walk into a party and all the attention would go to her. she may not have been the brightest student, but that didn't matter much either. ryder was rich, and as shallow as that statement was, it was the truth. they'd never have to worry about money if the both of them just found something that they could do well. ryder was a commonly scouted beater, and with his family name everyone wanted him on their team just for the sake for selling 'father-son uniforms' and market off of the 'sweet' relationship which in reality was anything but. the seventh-year couldn't stand his father. everything about him was wrong, and his main fear was becoming his father when he was older. it was for that reason that he tried to be nice to at least the hufflepuffs - it was kind of a self-redeeming, cathartic action to be kind to people. maybe that was why he was sweet to sapphire.

words: 531
notes: so, muse.
outfit: le uniform

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[sapphire matthews whitby]

for that i appreciate you sapphire could feel her entire body stiffen up slightly at those words. she wasn't sure how she felt about them. appreciate. was that a simple step under the four letter word that she wasn't even sure could really exist. while her parents seemed as though they were in love all the time, sapphire had never exactly thought that she could be in love. how could she? with her track record she expected no one to care for her. she expected for her life to be a huge sex fest until her thirties where she would end up with a junkie boyfriend, and live out her last few days sad and practically alone. but this? ryder? who was he to come and actually see if he could fall for her. because sapphire knew. she knew, a little more and she would be head over heels. head over heels a boy that she didn't want to be with. the worst part of it all? he was a slytherin, he was what she had sworn to hate. yet she still cared so much for him it hurt. even during quidditch matches sapphire had her eye on him, making sure he was okay. ryder was the reason that she was no longer allowed to commentate on slytherin matches. she found it funnier than anything else, a boy who she wasn't even official with, had made her disregard her job completely. that's what he did to her. and sapphire adored it.

she felt her eyes close as ryder's words took over her body. she loved the sound of his voice, it made her feel great, even complete. hell everything about him made her feel warm and nice on the inside. she wasn't sure if she hated it or completely loved it. sapphire leaned back into ryder's body as he hugged her tightly. this was one thing sapphire could get used to for the rest of her life. "it's just a tittle though, it's not like we're practically there," sapphire instantly regretted the words that come out of mouth. what if what had been holding ryder back this entire time what the tittle? what if ryder didn't want to be know as sapphire's boyfriend? hell sapphire wouldn't want to be know as that. she was such a slut, everyone knew that, half the school had slept with her and the other half was too young to try. why would ryder want to make it official? it would make him look like an idiot. sapphire could feel as her entire body became hard as a rock, she tried to loosen up but she couldn't. everything in her told her that he would freak out and run away. maybe sapphire wanted to as well, maybe this was it, just the month of great and utter bliss and then they would draw their line. she turned herself around so his arms were around her back, pressing her to him. "i didn't mean that... if you don't want it to mean that, then it wont, and i uh," sapphire found herself speaking at twenty miles an hour. she had never fought for a boy, not like this. she didn't know what to do, but she knew she didn't want to lose ryder.

words: 546
notes: deaddddd

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[ryder james bletchley]

"well... yeah. it's a title but it's... it's important to some people i guess." to ryder too. sapphire's dismissal of it nearly upset him, but he didn't want to bring it up right away. it was not his place to at all. but that got him thinking. why did he care so much if she didn't like that word? she was not his girlfriend, she didn't really seem to like the word. okay. well no! he liked that word- and if anyone was attached to it by now it was her. so what did he have to do about it? there were too roads. pull away and move on, or, just accept her to be his girlfriend and demand they use the term. so what would they do? it seemed to be up to ryder for a strange reason and it scared him absolutely shitless. but it was then that sapphire began to step on her words and become uncomfortable. it was almost comical. she thought he would get upset over her saying that? hell, a chuckle even came forth from his lips, almost unable to be heard. "well what if i wanted to call you my girlfriend officially? would you say yes to that?" he did not want to ask her right of the bat, if she said no it would make their relationship five hundred times more awkward than it had been already- which would have sucked completely. he liked the way their relationship was right now. they were comfortable with one another already, so what was the harm in tacking on the title? maybe the magnitude of that decision didn't hit ryder yet. it would in due time, but he thought he knew what he wanted in that very moment, and that was to call sapphire whitby his girlfriend. he wanted to hold her and love her endlessly, he wanted to kiss from her forehead to her lips, down her collar and chest, even kiss a little further down than that. ryder wanted to spoil her and give her anything her heart desired, and that meant giving himself too.

ryder's future was planned, yes. he knew where he wanted to live, what he wanted to do... the only unknown was with whom he wanted to reside. did he want a wife? kids? the idea made him panic. part of him wanted to be a debonair play boy as his father was. part of him wanted a different woman or even different women in his bed nightly without a care of commitment even going through his mind. was that a crime? no. every man had those fantasies of a harem that catered to their every whim. the only difference? ryder bletchley could make it happen with a snap of his fingers. he knew the right people. he had the money. he could charm any woman into his bed chamber and everyone in the school knew he could. so what was keeping him from doing just that with his future? part of him wanted a family. part of him wanted a woman to come home to every night, who cooked him food and cleaned- though of course he'd pitch in and do the dishes. part of him wanted a kid or two running between his legs when he attempted to give their mother a kiss. they'd make faces every time he and his spouse got affectionate, and his wife would just smile hopelessly and shake his head. ryder had decided this from a young age. he was to either become his father, or become everything his father was not.

words: 600
notes: --
outfit: le uniform

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[sapphire matthews whitby]

everything inside sapphire suddenly felt as though it were dying. those few moments were hell to her, if he were to just end what they had going sapphire wasn't sure what she would do. she had gotten so used to ryder. she knew things about him that she had never shared with anyone before. she felt comfortable with ryder. if people talked about him in a bad way she wanted to punch them all in the face, hell once sapphire slapped someone for saying what a player ryder was. no one talked about her ryder that way. she didn't care that he was a player, or that he used to be and now he was no longer one, she didn't want people talking about it. she just wanted him but if he didn't want her back, well how was she supposed to replace him? something horrible inside sapphire told her that ryder was irreplaceable, that there was no way she could get another one like him. he was everything she wanted a man to look like and be like. he was hot, he was manly, he had tattoos and he had muscle in all the right places but the best part about ryder? he was mushy, yet he let no one see that. sapphire knew though. sapphire knew a hell of a lot of things about ryder. she had grown to even like his little quirks. like the way he stuck his neck out at games, literally stuck it out, preferring himself to get hurt than others. it made him a better beater but it made sapphire a terrible commentator and audience member. any flaw ryder could ever have suddenly became great, and lovely and just the most adorable thing man could do. if anyone else were to do it, sapphire would have gone insane... but it was ryder. ryder was special.

the silence however was not. watching him as he looked her over and thought over what he would say was eating her alive. she was worried this would be the last time he would be holding her. that she would be in his arms. she would have hated for it to come down to that but if ryder was un happy then so be it. sapphire didn't want to see him happy, she would rather cause him happiness but if anything, she didn't want to take it away from him. when he asked but didn't ask her to be his girlfriend, sapphire didn't go numb, her eyes didn't go wide, she didn't faint (though she felt extremely close to) nothing like that happen. she simply felt confused. she blinked a few times and stared at the boy. "let me get this straight... the ryder bletchey is asking me, sapphire whitby, to be in a committed relationship?" she looked off into the grass as she spoke, repeating the sentence more to herself than to ryder. when they had started this, she figured a week maybe two and he would get bored. she never in her life thought it would amount to this. especially with her returning feelings. sapphire the only thing she knew how. her arms circled his neck and her lips were pressed against his, is a heated and much needed kiss. she quickly broke the kiss, only for a moment, to speak, a grin breaking out on her face. "yes. my answer would most definitely be yes," not a glimpse of regret or doubt passed through her face. sapphire had done many bad decisions in her life but she knew that making things official with ryder would not be one of them.

words: 604
notes: birthday sex for mimi! lol jk

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